Be Kind, Especially to Yourself
Full disclosure, friends: As we sneak up on a fresh year, full of possibility and blank slates, I often feel melancholy setting in. “How much time have I wasted? Why didn’t I take advantage of this or that? What kept me from going to the gym or reading better books or investing more time and energy in my relationships? When is the last time I updated that website I was so excited about? Am I a better person than I was twelve months ago? How many new failures have I accumulated?”
This kind of self-talk is destructive in every way, and I know it. Yet I continue, year after year, to create a compendium of my shortcomings. And rather than looking objectively at the list and allowing it to motivate, I become stuck. Shame never brings about healthy motivation. Never.
I often speak to myself in ways I would never dream of speaking to another human. I am critical. I am cruel. I am unforgiving. I understand that this is decades of learned behavior…I was raised with harsh words and the carryover into adulthood is a heavy burden. This year I will work with intention to break that cycle. I’ll re-parent myself, speaking kindly and with love. I’ll forgive my faults and failures and gently encourage the broken child within.
2020 was the year I started this goofy little project that has become one of the greatest joys in my life. That’s not hyperbole…Undercover Kindness Gnomes has quite literally changed my life. I am so grateful for each person who’s interacted and supported and followed this journey. I didn’t know if it would work or if anyone would respond, but you did! Thank you, from the bottom of my little gnome-loving heart.
A few last thoughts:
As you are looking to the year ahead, I encourage you, too, to be mindful of the words you use with yourself. Pat yourself on the back for every victory, even (or maybe especially) the small ones. Speak to yourself the words you need to hear. Pause occasionally and ask your inner self what you need. Treat yourself with the kindness you offer others.
This year I have encountered the kindest side of the internet and I am sincere when I say that I love you and I’m forever grateful for your impact on my life. Let’s continue to send tiny pals around the globe to spread love and light and kindness to a hurting world, shall we?